The Big Trial

So, this week I must say I am glad I am in Tokyo with the whole Casey Anthony trial going on. For those of you who do not know, I get into crime stuff like this back in the US. I remember where I was when the verdict for OJ Simpson was announced - freshman year of college at Furman University in my friends' room, left speechless at the announcement of a non-guilty verdict. Then when Natalie Holloway went missing, I was on vacation with my family. My sister and I were ADDICTED to the news every night. We would play euchere while watching the latest news, which was repeated hourly just by different anchors. Drew Peterson - remember him? My book club friends gave me books before I left for Japan and one of them gave me a book about his case. So, needless to say I get into this kind of stuff.

But this case with Casey Anthony, it hits a different chord in my gut. Maybe it is because I have a 2 and a half year old little girl. I am not writing this post to debate whether or not she killed the little girl. As Kan and I listened to news about the verdict on our sling box, we simply had to turn it off. It just hit too close to the heart with a little one in our home. But I wonder if I had been a juror, if I would have found her not guilty as well. My emotions would have wanted to find her guilty - I mean, what mother in her right mind is out partying while her little girl is missing? But when I look at the evidence and someone's life is in your hands, I wonder where I would have gone. It would have been so hard to be a juror on this case and keep your emotions in tact.

I am not even sure why I am writing this post. Maybe it is because I cannot really talk about the case with loads of my friends here. I do not think many of them follow the Casey Anthony trial out of Orlando, Florida. :) Maybe there is still a part of me that would love to go to law school. Even if I never practice law, I love studying and stuff like this really intrigues me. Or maybe, my heart just hurts for all of those involved...the little girl who is gone and for the mother - as clueless as she may seem, she has to be hurting. Whether the hurt stems from guilt over what she did or simply the fact that her child is gone, she has to hurt too. And although I do have my doubts as to the verdict of the case and was not too pleased with the outcome, I wonder who will show this woman love. Who will reach out to her? I think my heart must be changing somewhat...I would have never written this about OJ or Drew Peterson, but for now this is where my heart is. Maybe it is because I am a mom now, and I cannot imagine losing my child. I also know there are days where I want to pull my hair out, drink a bottle of wine after a long day, or even long for the days when I worked outside of the home and only had to take care of myself. Don't we all? We wouldn't want to trade in our kids by any stretch of the means, but I have days where I wish I was the main bread winner and Kan stayed home with the kids. :) Kan laughs when I tell him this as I could not bare to be away from Miyako for more than three days after having Kei and cried every time they left the hospital. But still...it is hard, being a mom, and I hope that someone will reach out to Miss Anthony and show her a greater love.